Owls and Orchids

image from hyperallergic.com

From earliest times men have been seen as the ‘Hunter – Gatherers’ and are still working on levels of sub personalities in this mode. However, in today’s society their personas have become much more divergent. Here is an example of what an atypical days in the life of a modern day married man might look like. This is a follow on from “A day in the life of….What’s Your Name?”

6am     Wake Up. ‘The Husband‘ greets his wife before heading to the bathroom to get ready for the day.

7am      Breakfast. ‘The Husband‘ tries to talk to his wife whilst ‘The Father’ pays some attention to the children before he has to leave for work. He feels a little frustrated that he hasn’t been able to give either his wife or his children enough of his time.

7.30am   ‘The Husband’  leaves for work, getting into his car he becomes ‘The Aggressive Pusher’, jumping between lanes, tailgating in an attempt to get to work early and get a head start on work at the office.

8.30am  ‘The Executive’ walks into the office, politely speaking with fellow colleagues whilst ‘The Dictator’ demands coffee from his secretary, taking out his frustrations on the first person available.  ‘The Rationalist’ apologises for being abrupt when she brings in his coffee. ‘The Coordinator‘  arranges for meetings to be scheduled during the day.  ‘The Chairman’ runs these meetings ensuring everything runs to schedule. As the group leaves ‘The Flirt’ pops out to share a few moments with one of the girls.

12 noon   ‘The Executive’ walks quickly to the luncheon appointment. ‘The Connoisseur’  selects an impressive meal, suitably impressing the clients. ‘The Raconteur’ regales the clients with small anecdotes and little personal touches to endear himself with the clients and build a rapport to help establish a further working relationship. ‘The Flirt’ shows a little charm towards the ladies and receives a few coy smiles in return.

1.20pm   After lunch,  ‘The Executive’ has the clients in his office signing contracts. ‘The Banker’ steps in as he pays some of his personal accounts, followed by ‘The Husband’ as he brings his wife up to date so she wont pay the same accounts. ‘The Executive’ returns, calling on the secretary to arrange through ‘The Coordinator’ for more meetings the next day.  On the way out of the office ‘The Mate’ comes out as he exchanges banter with the male colleagues.

5pm    ‘The Husband’ (he’s been thinking about home) gets in the car. ‘The Marauding Speedster‘ takes over as he sees an open stretch of road and he wants to feel some wind in his face. ‘Road Rage Roger’ may make an appearance if he’s held up too.  Along the way he sees an elderly lady standing next to her car, apparently broken down.  ‘The Protector’ appears and he stops to help her out. Back behind the wheel again ‘The Speedster’ takes over until he reaches home.

6pm   ‘The Husband’ arrives home and greets his wife. The children surround him and ‘The Father‘ appears. For a time ‘The Inner Child’ surfaces as he plays with his children. The children are reluctant to go to bed so ‘The Stern Older Judge‘ appears and shuttles them off to bed.

7pm    ‘The Husband’ is able to spend some quality time with his wife, talking over the days affairs and asking after her day. ‘The Lover’ appears as the night  passes and he helps prepare the romantic bath for his wife. ‘The Seducer’ is preparing the way for romance.

9pm  Fully relaxed and he and his wife share some couples time, bringing each other up to date on their respective days, (although he doesn’t mention flirting with the ladies). ‘The Romantic’ has prepared a glass of wine and perhaps some chocolates to enjoy.

10.30pm    ‘The Armchair Sports Fan’ watches some sport whilst his wife has a long hot soak.

11pm      Soft music and lighting fill the bedroom from the fragrant candles he has lit. Refreshed and languorous from her bath she walks into the bedroom. ‘The Husband‘/’The Lover’ meets  ‘The Wife‘/ ‘The Lover’ and………..‘The Seducer‘ meets ‘The Seduced‘, or is it vice versa?

image from http://www.sitcomsonline.com (Herman’s Head)

I’m complicated, sentimental, lovable, honest, loyal, decent, generous, likable, and lonely. My personality is not split; it’s shredded.    Unknown

This is a lighthearted look at a real situation. We are all complex human beings and these sub personalities assist us to complete sometimes difficult or mundane facets within out life. Look for example at the soldier; he undertakes hazardous duties which, under normal circumstances he would be unable to do. Training alone does not make a good soldier. ‘The Warrior’ is available for him or her to call upon to help him perform his duties, to keep him alert to danger and keep him safe.

Would we have it any other way? Perhaps only with Politicians, where we could expect that ‘The Negotiator’ or ‘The Politician’ would perform according to his promises, and not be ‘The Turncoat’ or ‘The Cheat’ or ‘The Deceiver’ they often turn into.  Such are the complexities of sub personalities.

Another, different look at this intriguing subject in a later blog.

Blessings, Susan x              ‘The Writer’ or ‘The Blogger’.

If you are interested in this article you might like to read:

Which ‘me’ are you talking to?

A Day in the Life of……What’s Your Name?

NB. The Voice Dialogue technique was the work of Hal and Sidra Stone. They identified hundreds of sub personalities and their interaction with each other and other people. This article in no way is a definitive work on the topic. If interested more detailed explanations can be found on their website.