image from arbroath.blogspot.com Role Reversal: The hunters gather for their meal in a cage.
~“Who doesn’t want to know that we notice them and value them? And who might respond to us better when they feel that they matter? It probably cannot be overstated – it matters…that people matter.”
― Steve Goodier
Valentine’s Day. (Today in the Southern Hemisphere) A day when lovers known or unknown, exchange gifts, where dinners of seduction are planned and escapades dreamed up, flowers and chocolates by the score are bought to celebrate the greatest gift one person can give another, love. Yet not everyone is smitten by the God of Love. For some, the idea of love seems a far cry from their reality.
I have never believed in putting people into neatly labelled baskets and saying, “this group are gifted”, “this group are the workers”, this group are the drones” and “these we kick to the kerb because they are useless”. I know there are people and organisations who work in this way. I believe it is an old model which was used to enforce the class structure prevalent at the time.
image from http://www.glogster.com – Class Structure – Food for Thought
We haven’t been able to leave the class structure behind yet, but I believe we will. When that happens there will be a new way of looking at people and there will be no elite or kicked to the kerb. Think about it, why should one group of people hold themselves up as better than the rest because they either have money or a “privileged background”?
In the same way I don’t believe it is right for knowledge to be hoarded when it can be shared for the betterment of everyone. Yes, there are people who need to learn or know something first and they are to be thanked, but it is the hoarding of knowledge which is used to keep people in the ‘class structure’ of the information age.
image from izquotes.com Who bought the rights to knowledge?
Even those who are ill have abilities and knowledge which can benefit others, yet they are more often downplayed to the extent that they cannot get people to look past the fact that they may be ‘disadvantaged’ in some way. Why should anyone become a second or third class citizen because they have an illness or disability, or because they happen to have been born within a certain racial or social structure? Segregation in any way is wrong. History has shown that all too clearly.
There may be those who want to say that my opinions are coloured by the fact that I am ill at present. Truthfully, after taking revolting medication for years and seeing no improvements I am questioning if I have been given the right diagnosis and if the medication is not doing more harm than good.
image from http://www.npr.org FDR – would he ever have been elected if people had known he was ‘disabled’?
Even though I have been ‘ill’ for some time it did not stop me from being a part time carer for my Dad when he had cancer. All Dad needed was the support to go through with his journey and he asked for very little. When my ex-husband had a mental breakdown and became chronically depressed I was his carer for many years. When my mother was diagnosed as terminally ill I was her carer for the larger part of the day. I never once, throughout these times thought I was hard done by, being asked to do ‘extra’ or that my parents were less than they had been. I would have been speechless if anyone asked me questions about my mother’s health instead of her.
Why is this important? It is important because of the way society thinks about people. Because I am ill and my husband is technically my carer, I am somehow lessened in the eyes of the establishment. He is asked questions about me, my health, and my attitude, my ability to do things, as though I am no longer capable of understanding or answering the questions. I have been relegated to a cipher, by society at large. I’m not the only one either.
. image from http://www.rctcbc.gov.uk
….image from http://www.budget.gov.au
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Some people have the opinion that a spouse, particularly if it is the husband, has a particularly rough time if he is the carer. They also think that they should receive accolades for doing what a woman; wife would do for her husband as a matter of course. He is thought of as being a special person for doing this. Why, because we are crossing traditional role boundaries? Role Reversal is not a new thing?
image from http://www.josephinewallart.co.uk Mystical Lovers
Today is Valentine’s Day and due in large part to the many accolade laden articles I have read, praising the husband for looking after the ill or disabled wife; I have been led to believe I shouldn’t think about Valentine’s Day in the usual way. (Not that I’ve ever given it a great deal of brain play in the past). I shouldn’t hope for a card, a flower, a coffee or dinner, a Valentine wish, because I am a lesser person. I’m not hale and hearty. I have failed to pass the mark to enter the halls of the acceptable. It’s been a very distressing and demoralising week.
Fortunately, I know, that not everyone thinks this way. Yet those who do; those who have forgotten that each person is a valuable member of society, that each person is a beautiful spirit having a human experience, has helped to undermine me, and any other ill or disadvantaged person, at a fragile moment.
image from http://www.fanpop.com
If Valentine’s Day is a celebration of love then it is not restricted by age, race, infirmity, colour, creed or faith. Love simply is. There are no passwords, secret handshakes or categories to say Love can only be for these people. There are many forms of love. It should be something which enfolds everyone and lifts everyone to new heights, with happiness and joy.
It is time to stop doling out acceptance or love based on someone’s arbitrary decision which is long outmoded.
image from idanceintherain.com –
It is not simply Valentine’s Day; it is the “Celebration of Love” Day and open to all. From my heart to yours I send wishes of love. May the day of love shine brightly in your heart.
image from stewartdesign.com – Love and acceptance, makes the heart swell with gratitude and happiness.
Love comes in many forms, don’t be misled by thinking it has to be a people love…. animals unconditional love and acceptance of people have saved more sanity and lives than anyone can truly know. Let your companion know you love them back. It feel wonderful, Love Actually is wonderful..
Happy Celebration of Love Day 2014.
Blessings, Susan ♥♥♥
© Susan Jamieson 2014
Owls and Orchids 
Sweet and beautiful ❤
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Great post Susan, hope you have a great day.
Laurie.
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You too Laurie, it only happens once a year… or more often if you’re lucky 😉 (flowers, chockies, wine I mean lol)
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Oh? I thought…….. Right, valentine’s day. 🙂
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Oh yes, and, the “we eat for you” club… made me laugh!
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I wish they would… I’d love to lose some weight. (sigh)
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Wonderful, very different perspective on life and the way it goes on around this planet! Brilliantly put.
Ray XXX
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Susan, this post is fantastic. I saw your Capitalism Graphic and the first thing I thought about was the range of emotions I went through when I saw the Michael Moore Documentary, ‘Capitalism, a Love Story’ – (Post I wrote on it is here: http://misslouella.wordpress.com/2014/01/28/just-jot-it-january-7-capitalism-a-love-story/)
I learned so much from watching that, and also had so many new questions. Many of my current views on policies – both domestic and international were better informed, and some areas slightly changed.
When it comes to ‘Role Reversal’ Women are so vital to the development and health of the community. I strongly believe that if more women were in positions that influenced domestic and foreign policies relating directly to community – things would go so much smoother in this world.
So often, people struggle with the idea that women can and do contribute in ways that their male counterparts do – and sometimes we do it better.. But there is no doubt, that the lives are improved for everyone if both sexes and the (non discriminate) roles they play within our communities are both acknowledged and supported!
Thanks for sharing this.
ML
x
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I agree – we changed from a matriarchal society which worked brilliantly – and without the huge violence to a patriarchal once which runs on violence. It has to make you question the status quo.
I truly believe change is on the way and governance will be totally shaken up. “We the People” may find we have more say in a reasonable method of determining how the world works, including many more women balancing how things are organised and done. – Just an opinion. 🙂
Susan x
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Agreed 🙂 Thanks for taking the time to engage in discussion on the topic – One of my favorites 🙂
ML
x
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I’ve checked out the post you mentioned, I’m afraid i allowed my opinionated self rather free reign…on topic. I thought I should warn you 😦
Susan
X
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lol Feel free to provide your opinion under free reign when ever you like in my space! We all have entirely unique experiences in the world and sharing our personal views on things, as well as providing reasoning for them, in my opinion is an excellent habit to get into.
This is how we learn 🙂 I like to think that my own thoughts, opinions and positions on things is flexible and I say this not considering for a second that it makes me fickle and easy to sway.
Being informed is key, and we can NEVER have all the information – #LoveDiscussion
Our perceptions are all thrown into the mix to make things even more exciting when it comes to sharing our positions!
Thank you for taking the time provide an honest account.
ML
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I can only ever promise to provide my #humble opinion. People, events, all change and alter the course of thought and the way things are done. #progress.
Blessings
Susan x
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#Yes 🙂
ML
x
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Great post! Hope you have a great Valentine’s Day! I love the picture of the dog–so cute! 🙂
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Same to you Jenn…. don’t chew your wool too much tho 😉
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Well said. Some things shouldn’t need to be spelled out. Sadly, they do. Have a great day. x
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Happy Valentine’s Day! Great post. I volunteered for a local non-profit for many years advocating for low-income parents. A group I belong to. The unfairness here with welfare is ridiculous. Low-income ppl are treated as those with a disability and taken advantage of, like the bottom of the barrel. I have a friend who has a granddaughter with MS. She says it is mostly the ‘wealthy’ people that give her ‘looks.’ One day human beings will look at the value of ALL human life instead of the mighty dollar.
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I agree and I feel kit may come sooner than we think. no-one wants to be on welfare, whether healthy or ill, but it shouldn’t mean you are treated like a lesser person. It is cruel and unjust.e all pay our taxes until something happens.
Blessings Susan x
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thank you, Susan. XOXO
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oh so right there with you on this! in such a similar situation and have faced much the same treatment. people asking my husband what i’d like to eat in a cafe rather than ask the person in the wheelchair. a complete role reversal with the worker becoming the home maker and the home maker becoming practially useless in the eyes of some. i get so angry with my husbands mother who takes every opportunity to say things like ” my poor boy” “oh youhvae so much to deal with now” etc! i say he now has more time for his own interests. no stress from work about constantly meeting higher and higher sales targets and he doesn;t have to drag his butt into work 5 days a week. if he’s tired he can jump back into bed for a couple of hours after the school drop off point. We enjoy time together that we never had time for before. he has a closer relationship with his children. so yes the role reversal may have been difficult, it may have been frightening to turn away from a paying wage and try to get by on benefits, he may have had to learn to cook and clean but there are good things but people only see a sick wife, having to take on the womans role and stop being a man! these things make me just a tad angry!
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Just a tad – I agree, but I want to rip their heads off at times! (That’s the celt coming out!)
Blessings Susan x
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okay.. a bit more than a tad! lol
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Hmm – only when I’m really annoyed lol 😉
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