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Posts Tagged ‘dreaming’

Waiting in the wings

Just around the corner

At the edge of sleep

Or as you start to wake

Are the memories

Of the past and

The hopes for the future.

image from fieldguidetoconservatism.blogspot.com

There is no magic carpet ride in the physical world we live in; that’s where our hopes and dreams are. If we are creative enough and believe in ourselves, we can create our magic carpet ride, fill our lives with magic and whatever it is that makes our hearts and minds sing. We can, if we but believe, bring our spirit alive with all manner of wondrous things. If we but believe – and are offered the support to allow our imaginations to blossom.

I am content that the extremes of human behaviour can still lift me to the heavens or crush me with sadness. I am grateful that I am able to feel those emotions to the fullest of my abilities. You might wonder why I would choose to be so saddened. It means, to me at least, that I am not inured to the grossness which people can descend to. I can still hold tight to the hope that if I give of my gratitude, love and well-being to the world, and enough others do the same, that we can make a difference to this wonderful world of ours.

I’d like to show you a small example, unhappy and unpleasant, but then, for some, that’s life.

Many years ago, when I was living in a country town, there was a horrendous event. A young child had been systematically abused by her mother’s defacto for years. Despite trying to tell her mother, she was not believed. Apparently her mother couldn’t believe her “wonderful boyfriend would want to be sexual with her teenage daughter when he had her to satisfy him.” The situation was even more horrendous than this and lasted for four years before she told a friend.

Everything this child told the police was true and the perpetrator confessed to the police. Her mother, in anger and frustration, blamed the child and threw her out of her home. The rest of her extended family refused to help her either and she was taken into Child Services until the trial.

This presented a dilemma. The police needed her to be at the trial and yet she had nowhere to stay where she felt supported in what was a horrendous time. This was how she came into my life. She stayed with us for the week whilst the trial was held.  She was visibly timid and trembled constantly. Despite the fact that my ex was the arresting officer she was obviously ill at ease with a man close to her.  After we went to bed for the night I heard her crying in her room.

My children were still babies and I couldn’t ignore the pain in this child’s cries. We spent the entire night talking, or rather she talked and I listened in mounting horror. She had been unable to talk to anyone about what had occurred after giving her statement to the police. Her trauma was so great she had been unable to open up to anyone. Somehow she felt safe enough to talk to me.

It was a long week, with little sleep for either of us. She desperately needed to talk to someone after each days’ events and I wouldn’t, couldn’t turn her away. It so so apparent she had not had the chance to get the horrors of the past out into the daylight so she could begin to heal. On the last day she flew through the front door and into my arms and sobbed for an hour. The Judge had sentenced the man to five years jail after he had been found guilty on all counts.

image from de.123rf.com

On the steps of the court her mother asked her to come back home, to look after the younger children so that she could work, but only until the day her boyfriend was released from jail. Then she would have to leave! After all that had happened, this broke her heart all over again. She wanted someone to tell her what to do, something I couldn’t do, even if, in my heart, I would have liked to.

We spent another long night talking, exploring the avenues she had open to her. She was, fortunately, now of an age where she could remain in town to complete her schooling. From there she was able, for the first time, to look at what she might like to do. I suggested she let herself dream of the possible things she might like to do and build her plans from there. She realised she had a future she could dream of and plan for.

The next morning she left and for the first time there appeared to be a huge weight lifted from her shoulders. The haunted look which shadowed her eyes was, not gone, but much lighter than I had ever seen. She was nervous but she was looking forward to tomorrow. She told me it was the first time she had been able to sleep without listening for the door opening. With tears in my eyes I hugged her and then waved her off.

Just over two years later I answered my phone and heard a bright cheerful voice on the other end.  Two years had made a tremendous difference to the frightened girl I met. She was going away to University, far away from her “home”. She told me of her dreams for the future, some already beginning and some she was still working on. She still had bad days, but the good ones outweighed the bad and she told me she dreamed of the wonderful things she was going to do. Somehow I know that her dreams came true.

I believe that when this child and I met, I was the one Blessed to be the hand holding a candle, to banish the darkness for her.  I believe that I was allowed to light a window into a future she could embroider to make her happy. I believe that magic happened, and that I was honoured to be able to witness that happening.

Magic is all around us, in the golden morning sunrise, the silvered evening moon glow, in the twinkling sounds of the fairies dance and in the bright imaginings by day or in the cocoon of sweet dreams.

I wish everyone the joy of magic and dreams fulfilled, laughter and far horizons. As it should be.

Blessings  Susan xx

“And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.”
― Roald Dahl

© Susan Jamieson

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Sunset 23 June. 10 (Copy)                                    Rosy hued skies on dusk waiting for the moonrise

.

As I sat in

Peaceful contemplation

Through the palm tree

Through the palm tree

Wrapped in

A cocoon of soft Alpaca

In favourite shades

Of purples and mauves

In  companionable anticipation

For the first sign

Of a rose coloured moon

I realised

In delighted surprise

The feeling of total

The rosy glow appears

The rosy glow appears

Relaxation

Contemplative meditation

Unexpected and uplifting

The first sight of rosy hue

Filled my heart on cue

With the beauty of Mother Nature

As the Goddess Selene

Rose higher in the night sky

Bathing the ocean in

Dressed in Rose Gold, Selene, Moon Goddess

Dressed in Rose Gold, Selene, Moon Goddess

Molten gold

Her magic plain for all

To behold.

Glorious sunset over the Mediterranean.

Golden moonrise

“The moon is a loyal companion.
It never leaves. It’s always there, watching, steadfast, knowing us in our light and dark moments, changing forever just as we do. Every day it’s a different version of itself. Sometimes weak and wan, sometimes strong and full of light. The moon understands what it means to be human.
Uncertain. Alone. Cratered by imperfections.”
― Tahereh Mafi, Shatter Me

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I hope you enjoy my moon odyssey as much as I.

.

Blessed be.  Susan x

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unable to sleep

image courtesy of youngwivestales.wordpress.com

He would lie in the bed and finally, with daylight, he would go to sleep. After all, he said to himself, it is probably only insomnia. Many must have it.”
Ernest Hemingway, A Clean Well Lighted Place

There is something so frustrating about not being able to go to sleep, or perhaps worse, continually waking after falling asleep. Either one will leave you feeling tired and irritable the next morning and there is nothing known (not that I know) which can give you back the lost hours of sleep.  I have counted sheep and found it totally irritating. I have warmed milk and sipped it. The effort of getting up and warming it has seemed to wake me even further.  I have decided to get up and read for a while until my eyes are heavy enough to close.  Feels successful until you lay down again and those eyes which are burning to remain closed and let you sleep, pop open once more.  In fact, frustration really doesn’t do the feeling justice.

The irony is, there isn’t always a reason for it happening.  Sometimes there will be a thorny problem which you cannot let go of and it runs around your brain seeking a way out. If only a door could be found it would be a wonderful way to exorcise that scenario!  However, this time there was a quite reasonable  explanation. Just as I was drifting off to sleep I heard what sounded like a loud crash, something rather substantial being broken, outside near the patio.

broken flower pot
image courtesy of noaz.blogspot.com

A search didn’t reveal too much, the lights don’t really cover the area very well. All appeared to be okay and I couldn’t see any stray cats, dogs or possums hiding in the corners, nor anything out-of-place.  Still, I could hear the possums cavorting across the roof the next time I laid down and had almost fallen asleep. Hmm – the likely culprits?  I love the little things, okay, perhaps not so little, and definitely not to be tangled with if you don’t want to be scratched or bitten, but cute all the  same.  They sounded, at times, like a herd of rampaging bull elephants charging over the roof.

We have tried to keep the branches  far enough away from the roof so they can’t easily get across, and have had a fair degree of success until last night. Obviously the foliage grew faster than our vigilance of the garden.  Since they were having fun and I was well and truly awake I decided I would try to get a nice photo of them.  Further frustration ensued. Even twisting myself into a human pretzel I couldn’t see over the roof to get a clear sight of them.  When they escaped into the trees they were too far away with my puny torch to light up the area where they were. I could see them but the light simply wasn’t enough for the camera.  So they sat there ‘laughing at me’.

ring tail possums in tree

image courtesy of timpanogos.wordpress.com

So, here I sit, wide awake, temporarily, since I can feel my energy levels finally running on empty, finishing my little tale of woe of broken sleep.  I would be delighted to watch possums or any other nighttime creature – before I go to bed!  We will have to fix the branches which allow them to gain access to the roof. I really don’t want them in the roof, or breaking the tiles, especially if we have rain forecast, as we currently do.  (Murphy’s Law).  Now that I think about it, – the brain is slowing down so sleep must be near – I wouldn’t be too keen on bats visiting me during the night either.  I’m not an avid bat fan even if I do like vampire movies.

So, since the ‘sun’ is up and the possums have retired, I’m heading to the land of nod for a few hours of well deserved sleep. Despite feeling tired I wouldn’t have it any other way. It’s a blessing seeing the animals around the property, and we have been blessed with a wide assortment of wildlife from birds, possums, owls, to a very quiet carpet snake.  Fortunately for me, he was much smaller than my friends resident carpet snake, who, after what may well have been a possum dinner, was so huge I doubt he could have retired to her ceiling where he normally lives.  I guess my luck was running good there!

So I hope all the slumberers from my neck of the world had a restful night and I wish all those on the other side of the world a restful night to come. Goodnight !

peaceful sleep
image courtesy of sleep.lovetoknow.com

“Arousing from the most profound of slumbers, we break the gossamer web of some dream. Yet in a second afterward, (so frail may that web have been) we remember not that we have dreamed.”

– from “The Pit and the Pendulum” Edgar Allan Poe

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