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Posts Tagged ‘Marriage’

Ray, Mum New Year Eve 2011, Moruya

They “year” began with New Years Eve at Ray’s parents in Moruya.  A beautiful day and night set the tone for the year to come.  It was a wonderful few days, seeing the sights – a finding a great little crystal shop. Needless to say I came home with bags of crystals. (We drove or it wouldn’t have been possible).

Tawny Frogmouth

A Tawny Frogmouth let himself be known early on and has been a visitor ever since.  We have at least four different owls living in the area, from a Powerful Owl, the Frogmouth and what looks like a Barn Owl, plus a very reclusive one we hear often but haven’t managed to get a good photo of yet.

Owls being my favourite birds, it was a real blessing seeing one so soon after we moved into our new home.

Presented to the guests, husband and wife

Presented to the guests, husband and wife

May was a brilliant month, and after months of preparation our wedding went off superbly. Here we are presented for the first time as Mr and Mrs  Jamieson, can you tell how happy we were – and are.  I’ve restrained myself to one photo, it’s hard to know which ones to use and there are so many!

Natalie and Christopher   Couldn’t pass the day up without showing off how fabulous my son and daughter looked on the day either.

One of my favourite gifts came from my husband shortly before we were to go away, a Nikon 150 camera. It is fantastic and even an amateur like me can get some marvellous shots. Most of all it made it super easy to have something to remember all the marvellous things which happened throughout the year.  A few lessons and I might make a reasonable photographer!

The Little Blowhole at Kiama, dodging salt spray to get a good picture.

The Little Blowhole at Kiama, dodging salt spray to get a good picture.

We had been so busy during the year that we hadn’t had a break – even after the wedding, so we spent a glorious week at Kiama, exploring the area and having a well-earned rest.  The Blowholes were in fine form and we saw lots of whales passing by.  Here’s the best picture we managed to get of the whales passing.

Occasionally I wished for a super zoom on my camera so I could get more photos – they really are beautiful creatures.

Humpback passing Kiama whilst we were there.

I found Nicole’s blog and became motivated to get back on track with my spiritual growth. It has been a wonderful year of rediscovery and discovery of new exciting things.

Full Moon Ceremony Aug 31 2012 (Copy)Thanks to Nicole we had a fantastic ceremony provided for the Blue Moon in August.  This was taken just after the “Releasing Ceremony” and the crystals were in the bowls of water. The next night we had a “Becoming Ceremony”  which finalised the entire ritual. It was an awesome feeling and really made us feel great.  My blogging journey began shortly after this.  Reading and writing have always been passions, now they are intertwined beautifully.

Cutting the birthday cake

With lots of work in between we went back to Moruya to celebrate my father in law’s 80th birthday bash in October.  It was a beautiful day and night – in fact they outdid the younger guests. It seems stamina comes with age!   The cake was superb, it was only spoiled by the fact we couldn’t bring any home with us!

Coffs Harbour, Crystsl Castle and home 034

On the way home we stopped at Coffs Harbour for the night and the next day were greeted by this beautiful water dragon on the decking near the water feature. He was so tame he let us get really close. Obviously very used to all the visitors, he’s probably quite the model by now!  See he even gave us a good pose for the camera.Getting friendly with the neighbours horse2012 022 (Copy)

Back home we were back hard at work but love to take a walk around the garden at the end of the day.  Here the neighbours horse came over to say hello and was really friendly.  My first ‘kiss’ from a horse – strangely enough it was a special moment for me and I’m blessed Ray got the photo and so filled with gratitude that the horse was so  friendly.

Ray hard at work, surprissed by the camera!

I’d love to know the identity of this little fellow but just love his colouring.

Blue flash honey eater

We have lots of honey eaters visiting with the flowering trees. Some like this fellow seem totally oblivious to our presence and let us snap away merrily as he feeds. His colouring is ‘electric’!

Kookaburra ready for a dip in the pool

We were graced by a family of kookaburra who came down several times a day to take a dip in our pool as the weather became hotter.  They made lots of noise but it was worth it.  Occasionally there would be a line up of all the different birds waiting to take a dip. It was really funny watching them take off one by one and then ruffling their feathers out as they waited their next turn.

Water Dragon sunning himself on our garden seat

We were surprised and pleased to find another water dragon sunning himself at home.  When he was in the pool area I “chased” him around the pool  – from the upstairs balcony, to get some photos of him. It was so funny seeing me trying to run around to capture a good shot. As soon as I had him in focus he would take off again after some other tidbit he’d spied.

Christmas surprises

Christmas seemed to arrive so quickly. It was a special time for us – the first one as a married couple (old-fashioned isn’t it?) and getting the decorating done together with the family coming down to celebrate Christmas Day together. We were grateful we could all be together and Ray and I felt blessed that our family could get together when so many couldn’t.

Full Moon 30th December 2012

The last full moon of the year, December 2012.  Even with the inclement weather we were able to get some beautiful photos of the moon through the trees and the weather remained fine for our ceremony.  The meditation from Nicole was a beautiful way to complete a wonderful year.

As always we are mindful that not everyone has been as fortunate as ourselves. Like most people we have had our ups and downs. At times it felt as though the downs were holding mired in one place for far too long, but 2013 will be a wonderful year – for everyone.  Throughout 2012 we have tried to remain mindful of what has been happening for us, being present at the important events was easy, how could we not. Being present when things were tough was harder, but we managed and it felt very heart centered in being able to do that. Ill health has been a drag but I’m hoping that with a new move, hopefully to a place with some space around it will give me the right atmosphere to get on top of things.  Country life seems to beckon.

For myself, the unconditional love I have been so grateful to find with Ray has made this a wonderful, love filled year. Heart centered and soul centered, we have felt the growing and stretching of our soul growth throughout the good times and the hard times.  We have also felt, and been awed by the presence of spirit, our loved ones who are no longer with us – in the flesh at least. It has made each special occasion that little bit more extraordinary and that is something I am incredibly grateful for.

The records for 2013 are now about to begin!

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Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year.    Ralph Waldo Emerson

HAPPY 2013 EVERYONE.                                              Blessings and stay safe.

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image from duskyshadow.blogspot.com It’s hard to see the light when you feel oppressed by the darkness.

Life is filled with unanswered questions, but it is the courage to seek those answers that continues to give meaning to life. You can spend your life wallowing in despair, wondering why you were the one who was led towards the road strewn with pain, or you can be grateful that you are strong enough to survive it.”   J.D. Stroube, Caged by Damnation

There are twelve days to go until Christmas and I have  begun to reflect on the past year.  It has been a crazy year, at times a crappy year, sometimes insanely fabulous, filled with enormous highs and unplumbed lows, this year more lows than highs it seems. There were times when I didn’t think I would make it and yet, underneath all that, I knew I had to, I had no choice. I have several very important reasons why failure is not an option, why the ongoing struggle must continue no matter what, and they are and have been constant for many years now, but I will admit it becomes harder and harder each time I feel knocked to the ground again.

Last Christmas I was in a state of total overwhelm.  I was trying to pack, look for a new place to live (at Christmas of all times), continue to work in a cramped space and get everything ready to produce that once a year treat, Christmas dinner with all the trimmings, lots of love and of course gifts.  There were difficulties with getting money paid which was owing to us, knowing that if it didn’t make it in time it wasn’t going to come through until well into the New Year.  The fact that it was a substantial amount, dragging on for months, didn’t make the situation easier to handle.   It was not an auspicious way to bring the New Year in, but I managed to keep that from everyone and we had a fabulous day. I simply collapsed after they left. A four-hour visit after a marathon effort – who decides if it’s worth the effort? Broke and needing to move, not able to physically move much, I questioned my sanity on a daily basis. Of course, there is much more to this story, many more things which added to the mounting stress, and there were times I felt I would have sold my soul to have someone to talk to. It’s all the other “stuff” left unsaid which pushed me to the brink.

image from christmas.lovetoknow.com The ultimate indulgence. I wonder what it is really like?

Of course, as my doctor warned me, stress and tension are no good for me – or anyone else, and my back was telling me just that, thanks to the car accidents I had  been involved in.  Movement of any kind was agonising, bands of intense pain lanced through me each time I moved. Even trying to rest in bed was impossible, since stillness simply allowed the muscles to seize completely. I questioned the sanity of continuing the struggle, disgusted with my ‘failure’ to overcome this obstacle, so I continually searched for some enlightenment or explanation which might help.  I was lost in a dense forest, dark and lonely and desperate for answers. I was drowning under the weight of the circumstances and exhausted from fighting to find a way forward.

image from deborahswift.blogspot.com It’s not the night which is dark, it’s the despair in your soul. The despair comes from the deep longing to find that light at the end of the tunnel.

I was planning my wedding, struggling with unpacking, trying to work and get all the arrangements in place for May. I had chosen my mothers birthday since she had passed away and I knew it would bring her closer to me at that time.  It is still a raw wound, one I have no idea how to begin to heal, my mother, my best friend, and when I believed I had finally found my corner of heaven she wasn’t here to share it with. Oh, I know, in spirit they were here, but their physical presence, the ability to talk things through with them….Time, a great healer I am told, is scant comfort.

Perhaps I’m too stubborn by nature but failure was not an option and I had no-one I could call on to help. In this day and age it seems strange to admit that. It was a beautiful day. My dress was all I could have hoped for, my daughter, as my attendant was beautiful and my son gave me away – looking so strong and tall. The groom and his son (best man) were just as resplendent, but then I am biased. It was the only highlight of my year.

Avalon Gardens

So what happened after that?  The ongoing struggle financially began to erode my self-confidence and despair crept in.  I found  the blog of someone I admire greatly and I took it to be a sign, the one I had been asking for. It became a challenge to read her blogs every day. How on earth did she manage to write every day I wondered when some days I couldn’t string together two coherent thoughts?

Some days I found it hard to get myself together before mid afternoon. What incentive was there to do otherwise?  I thought no-one would want to read my “dark and twisty’ thoughts, and they were all that consumed me, all that I could see.  I followed a gratitude challenge and kept going.  It had started to life that dark cloud and I was  grateful for all it was teaching me, mindfulness, being present, unconditional love, amazing insights each day. A way out of the dark labyrinth I thought.

I started blogging a long time later. It began as a challenge for me, since I didn’t believe I could do it, and ironically, I didn’t think anyone else would want to hear what I was saying.  I needed an outlet for what I was thinking and feeling. I was tired of the never-ending struggle to sleep, wake, find that motivation to do something, even an interest in doing something.  I needed to feel what I was doing was making a small difference somewhere, in some small way. It was an attempt to find the light inside me and share it with others. I’m not sure if I have been successful with that yet.

image from bloggergeeze.com The urge to blog

Christmas is so difficult. My father passed away on January 2nd and that last Christmas was so hard. Sitting by his bedside, alone at the end was something I will never forget.  Then, the cycle repeated with my mother and my last anchor was gone. Now, I had to be the sole “stanchion” in my family, for the sake of my children and my brothers. The cracks appeared. I could see them, feel them, but I had become very good at “painting on my face” and putting on a good front, papering over the cracks.  I was told I was “unemotional and cold” because I couldn’t cry at her funeral. My tears were dammed up inside.  They still are in large part. Perhaps the truth is that the dam is finally breaking under the strain.

So, once again, what happened to the fairytale?  So much and since it’s not just “my story” it makes it difficult knowing what to write. There is so much it would be another blog in itself.  Although it is a part of why I’ve lost my tenuous grasp on who I am and why I’m here. Whatever the reason I’ve slipped, my roller coaster has fallen off its rails and the forest has enmeshed me in its thorny bushes and if I cry I’m not sure I can stop.

Sometimes, honest people are hard to find, especially in the finance game.  Licensees can be pariahs and this one is withholding thousands of dollars. Money which was earned after a lot of hard work, money they take 10% off the top of and then almost $2000 a month for the privilege of being under their license. Why? Because they can under a pretext and here we are again, after a hard years exhausting work,  “on the bones of our asses” trying to find money just to pretend Christmas is still Christmas.  I’m not sure if we will even have anywhere to live after the next couple of weeks. I’m tired of the never ending struggle.

image from proactiveinvestors.com.au

I desperately need to hear another voice, someone to let me know I’m not really insane, we will “make it through the night”, but I’m terribly good at scaring people off.  I’m even better at not asking for help, a lesson someone taught me many years ago when I was young and impressionable and found that asking for help gave them the power to use that to hurt you more deeply that you thought possible.  Of course, the one person who matters most I can’t ask. Well I can and have but I knew the answer before it came.  I need an outside perspective, but is that possible? I don’t know the answer to that any longer either.

image from funnycutestuff.com Everyone needs a hug

At the end of the day we must, I must, believe in something. I choose to believe this!  And this is the closest I can come to my tenuous hold on life. I crave to feel the warmth and love from “my puppy”, to love unconditionally, who will always be there, always loving and never hurting. My last dog passed away at age 17 and a half.

My logical self is telling me this is the wrong time to post this. My heart tells me I have to. I apologise for the hopelessness I feel flowing from these words.  I hope someone out there is listening.

Two qualities are indispensable: first, an intellect that, even in the darkest hour, retains some glimmerings of the inner light which leads to truth; and second, the courage to follow this faint light wherever it may lead.  Karl Von Clausewitz

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“Sometime in your life you will go on a journey.
It will be the longest journey you have ever taken.
It is the journey to find yourself.”

Katherine Sharp Simple Abundance

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magic journal

image courtesy of ancientchildren.com

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Theres no denying, the path to self discovery is full of half filled journals. Each one begun with zeal and promise and oft-times left forgotten under the press of other, more important matters.  The funny thing about journals is that they aren’t a new thing. Writing in a journal has been an occupation which has been around for hundreds of years. The main difference is that they were often called diaries back then.  Many a fair Victorian lady could be seen writing in her diary, her thoughts, her hopes, her dreams and it was a perfectly acceptable, indeed, it was a recommended pastime for a young lady.  They even date back to Roman times and were called  a ‘diurnal’.

So why have they achieved so much prominence now?  My personal view is that many people have taken the route to self discovery and recognised the value of keeping a journal. It allows you to order your thoughts, identify recurring patterns of behaviour or thoughts and allows you to express those inner most desires we often don’t wish to share with anyone else.  They also allow you a path to self discovery and improvement. Recently I completed a 30 day Gratitude Challenge wherein I kept a journal, (a Gratitude Journal) for thirty days.  We looked at the things in our daily lives for which we were grateful.  When viewed from a different perspective it is amazing to find how many things each day we can be grateful for. With the right degree of coaching (suggestions on how to look at the every day things in a different light), it is incredibly easy to find many incidental things we are grateful for, the sunny day instead of rain, the rainy day to water the garden and bring on our plants, the beautiful moon shining down on us, the help of a stranger as we struggle with our shopping, the smile from a waitress as she brings our order, the love and understanding from a husband or wife, the smile and hug from a child. The list becomes endless when you look with different eyes at the world around us.

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ladybug lavendar

image courtesy of inside919.ning.com

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However, we, my husband and I, have had so much fun doing the Gratitude Challenge that we decided to repeat it again.  We are finding more and more things we are grateful for and we are finding ourselves happier each day as we fill in our journal. We are also happier with each other because we have more things we are grateful for about each other!  A wonderful bonus! So we decided it would be even more fun to combine our journal with a personal history.  We had already decided to make a travel journal, recording each outing, however big or small, one picture to act as a memory trigger and writing about the activities and what we had appreciated about them.  In essence, what we were grateful for as a result of our experiences.

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On thinking about what we planned we decided to get a large two ring binder, not a small one since we plan on putting lots into this, and called it a “Living Journal” because it was something we were going to continue to add to throughout our lives. It would be a record of our journey, with gratitude, throughout all the countries and places we visited and recorded in our “Living Journal.”   Sounds great!  It couldn’t be any old two ring binder though. We wanted to make it something special from the outset to match the intent we had for it.

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So we went out and wandered through the craft areas of one of the local shops and gathered the supplies we thought would make this something extra special. We came home with styrofoam and wadding to make it nicely padded.  We found two different types of material to decorate it with, plus some ‘rope binding’ to divide the segments.  We also have some glitter stickers and butterflies to finish off the dressing.   We made a start this evening, getting the foam glued to the folder – and melting some in the process. We learned to be grateful it wasn’t glued to the board we rested it on!  We played around with the material deciding which pictures we might like in each ‘quadrant’ (there will be four sections front and back but not squared off or totally symmetrical since life isn’t boxed up so neatly),  and how it would be finished off with the other adornments.  I  have a feeling we may decide to add to it but that’s part of the fun.

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hand decorated journals
image courtesy of  liesel.typepad.com

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We already have a couple of small outings planned and a slightly longer holiday plus a big eightieth birthday party to attend. Dare I say it, we are almost excited to be able to start filling our journal! The wonderful thing about it is that we can simply add the pages as we like, until it is filled and then we can begin another!  We can use coloured or plain paper. We can each write what we like to add to the photo memory and add anything else which was special at that time. Perhaps an entry ticket somewhere or an information leaflet.  The list is only limited by our imagination and what we are grateful for.

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Now I’m off to bed to dream about decorating my journal,  my “Living Journal”  and,  since I feel I may want to decorate others now I have begun one, I’ll dream of the other also.  I may take lessons in how to make them really decorative and the wonderful things about it is that we can look back on it later and have the memories as fresh as the day they happened.  Lots of work and happy memories.  A “Living Journal”  – what a great idea Ray.

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happy couple in europe
image courtesy of  dexknows.com

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“The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.”
Bill Cosby

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handmade journals

image courtesy of jonnabarnett.blogspot.com

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Best friends

Best Friends by oneinsightcloser.com

As small children it seems easy to make friends. We actually do it without thinking, a new child appears in the group and they are automatically included and join in whatever is happening. The most beautiful friendships can develop from there, some lasting a lifetime. The innocence is heartwarming and  everyone loves to see it. The friendship of small children is like a garden of flowers, bright, beautiful and always making you smile.

It’s a proven fact that the majority of friendships are made during the school years.  Some of us make them throughout lower school and some during university. The bonds of friendship are tested through time and we have someone we can rely on in good times and bad. They are there when we need a shoulder to cry on when our first love disappears, and are there with a hug and  simple acceptance when life turns sad as we lose someone close. There  is a closeness which nothing diminishes and we are all the better and stronger for it. Grief seems easier to bear with a close friend and a friendly shoulder.

Yet there are also those of us, who, for no apparent reason, go through our young lives without forming those close bonds. We may have been picked on because we didn’t conform to the norm. We were ‘fat’, wore strange clothes, had funny hair or spoke with a different accent. Sometimes there is no reason we can find for not being part of the group and not finding that closeness that friendship can bring. Occasionally something happens and after being part of a circle of friends the group decides to ostracize you. There seems no rhyme or reason yet it happens and you flounder to find a way through the rejection.  My friends ‘came back’ once they realised that I wasn’t going to ‘moon’ around after them. In fact I avoided being anywhere near them and they found that too uncomfortable. So, being in a relatively small community, I was invited back in again. There was one rather major problem though. I didn’t like being rejected and I definitely didn’t like being hurt. I rejoined the group but not before I had made a solemn promise to myself. Never again would I allow anyone to have the power to hurt me in that way again. No-one would get ‘in’ to break my heart.  For a long time it worked too.  I moved through life, apparently part of a group of friends, without anyone special, but still one of ‘the pack’.
Sad girl

Unless we are in this lonely situation we may not even think about it. Life is too hectic and we have too many things to distract us that we don’t see what may be right there in front of us. Of course, even worse than that blindness is being in the midst of that isolation yourself.  Who do you turn to for support if you don’t have a close friend, or for that matter, anyone you can call a friend. It’s not simply sad, it’s not even pathetic, it’s crushing and soul devouring. It can be even worse. My garden of flowers had become overrun with weeds.

Not long ago I was in the situation where a long-term marriage was reaching its last gasp.  I had used up all my reserves of energy, was worn out and could no longer think of any alternatives to try in order to save a relationship already dead, it simply hadn’t remembered to stop breathing yet.  Everything had been tried. We talked to counsellors, friends, family and probably driven each other to the edge of insanity trying to talk through insurmountable problems with no end in sight. At least they had become insurmountable as I realised we had drifted so far from each other that there was no point of reference at which to begin a ‘rescue attempt’.  It was heartbreaking, not being able to save something I’d given over two decades of my life to and had believe would last a lifetime.  Two strangers sharing the same space with nothing in common any longer.   Ironically for me, my husband at the time really couldn’t see that we had a problem.  “Had a problem”, that was a laugh, the problems were so many it was hard to know where to begin when the counsellor asked what the problem was. I believe that was the point at which I realised a rescue attempt was simply not going to work. So he blamed me for the demise of our relationship. there always has to be someone at fault.
arguing couple

image courtesy of ourwayit.com

I wanted, for the sake of my  – our – children to stay as long as possible and let them have a ‘family’ life.  For me, for us, it was a stupid mistake. Instead of seeing a good family life they say what can happen when love has simply drifted away.  The best of marriages are founded on a basis of friendship. That deep connection where two people know, without words, that the other is always there for them, a support in good times and bad.   Now we had a situation where, whilst not enemies, there was nothing there to build anything on, not even for the children’s sake.  Yet the parting held “no such sweet sorrow” but only relief.  If only that had been the end of it. Some things just linger on and on.

There is a prevailing belief in society today that marriage breakdown is a disease, something which can be caught if you aren’t careful. All the ‘friends’ I believed I had suddenly melted into the ether.  Far from having someone to talk to, to help ease the confusion and sadness, share a coffee with and provide that warm hug to help give you strength, I found I was isolated and alone.  From a place where the struggle had been a nightmare, a new nightmare began.  For some reason this seemed even worse than before.  Now I was faced with a situation where I felt there had to be something ‘wrong’ with me or I wouldn’t be rejected yet again.  All the old hurts from my childhood returned with even more vigour and I had nowhere to turn to find out why it had happened.  My garden of weeds had become a jungle of weeds, thorny and poisonous.
thorny weeds

image courtesy of mooseyscountrygarden.com

I’d like to say there is an easy solution. I’d love to say there is a solution at all. I still don’t have that wonderful friend I’ve been searching for, someone to share a laugh and a coffee; go window shopping or watch a movie together’ share a heart to heart when we need one. I feel the lack frequently when I hear or read about someone enjoying time with a friend or friends.  I haven’t worked out what to do although I’m told I’m a nice person, helpful, kind and considerate. Not to blow my own trumpet, but who else will.   I need a friend. I know that and would welcome one into my life and one day one will turn up. That will be a beautiful day and I will treasure it forever.

There is a happy ending though.  After finally giving up on relationships completely and deciding to ‘retire’ to a unit ‘far, far away, spending the rest of a long life become a crabby old spinster, knitting in my rocking chair,  I met a wonderful and charming man who completely knocked me off my feet.  He was, not to exaggerate, everything I had always dreamed of but doubted I would ever find.  He is a gentleman. He opens my door and carries my parcels for me. Not because I can’t but because he likes to do something nice for me. He loves to make a cup of tea and we share cooking dinner together. In fact we share almost everything and it isn’t overpowering, it feels darned good. I can finish his thoughts, and pick up on what he is thinking. We will both decide at the same time that we feel like going out for a coffee or a movie, a walk on the beach or sharing a picnic when the moon is full. I found my ‘soul mate’ for real, and I couldn’t be happier for it.  My life has turned full circle.  My ‘best friend’ (apart from my husband who is also my best friend as well as my husband, lover and partner) will arrive one day soon and life will be complete.  We  have so many things we are planning, work, travel, fun, new businesses we love, life is so full it is breathtaking. I have been truly blessed. I know that life will continue to be blessed. Why, because that’s how it’s meant to be, how we are planning it to be and so it will be.

Garden of roses

Keep the faith, friends come and go, some take longer than others, weeds always grow in untended soil but when the roses bloom, magic fills the air, and of course the fairies.

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.bright sunny day: courtesay of shutterbuck

My day started out quite like any other day of late.  It was later, much later than I really liked but when one has trouble sleeping it isn’t very often one gets to see the sun rise  unless one has spent the night awake…like now.  However, it was a beautiful morning, I could tell from my bleary squint through the window that the sun was shining, and I could hear quite distinctly the songs of the birds visiting my back yard. I have been blessed with a large pond in the back yard and all manner of ducks, water hens, herons, egrets, ibis, cockatoos, kookaburra and so one decide to visit at times during the day. I realise how very fortunate I am.
So the day began in a semi normal fashion. I staggered, bleary eyed from my bedroom to the en suite, trying desperately not to kill myself by bumping into too many walls, desks, dressing tables etc.  On the way out I heard a welcome voice promising a wonderful restorative, a nice cup of Earl Grey tea to wake me up for the day.  Wonderful. I am so lucky. This is where the day began to transform…. just as my eager hands were reaching for this heavenly cup it was snatched back, and a voice from somewhere above me reminded me I had a blood test to go to – a fasting blood test! Urgh!!

This was so not what I wanted to hear. I’m no slouch with needles, they’ve never bothered me, no matter how large they appeared. It’s all over with relatively quickly anyway. However, I’d had barely three hours sleep, a long line of three-hour nights and I was feeling more than a little seedy.  I was not a happy camper and didn’t want to leave my warm cocoon. Into the bathroom I was chivvied and in an indecent time I was showered and dressed, ready to have my precious and dwindling supply of blood siphoned once more.  Okay, I know it replenished itself, but there comes a time when you begin to wonder if they can continue to take it and you wont run short! One blood test later and I was more than ready for my Earl Grey.

Blood test: courtesy of popsci.com.au

A quick trip home for some refreshments, and I realised I had another appointment, due very shortly, with the post office to get my passport ‘renewed’.  Renewed is not the right term because it hasn’t expired, but I did get married a couple of months ago and it needed updating since I had decided to change all my documents over to my new married surname.  There are arguments for and against this. It’s lovely after the wedding and I’m old-fashioned enough to think it’s appropriate, but this has been a nightmare.  You see it’s not the first time I’ve been through this.  The first time was really easy, over in a flash, not many things to change I suppose. The last time was a mammoth effort. I had decided to change my name by “Deed Poll” although they have now changed the name, but the essence is the same.  I didn’t want to feel I was ‘going back’ to my old name, I wanted a new start, moving forward, putting the past behind me and upward and onward to brighter and better things. Strangely enough it was, whilst being a mammoth task to gather all the documents, in reality a painless procedure and all the name changes were done inside ten days. Quite good I thought considering the greatly amassed number of cards and papers I had accumulated since the first time.

Then the ‘fun’ began. Most of the legal departments will not accept a marriage certificate as a name change validation if you have changed your name previously by “Deed Poll’, you have to change it formally by  ‘Deed Poll’ yet again. So, application for marriage certificate – good enough for most places, two hundred dollars for a name change certificate to satisfy the nit-picking departments.  I was not happy.  However, all paperwork complete I trotted off to the post office to get my passport sorted out and then we can plan a belated honeymoon.
Freycinet National Park Photos
This photo of Freycinet National Park is courtesy of TripAdvisor” alt=”Honeymoon idyll: courtesy tripadvisor.com” />

Now I really had thrown a spanner in the works. The marriage certificate – great – change of name, hmm. A long conversation in the back room and another equally long phone conversation to the passport office and all the paperwork is being sent in and they will then decide if they can do it or I have to pay for a new one because of the name change form! Phooey!  Not that the girl at the post office wasn’t helpful. The original Australia Post photos were from an old camera, beware, if they are taken  on an old camera they are no longer the right size. Luckily she took new photos at no charge. The others had been taken the day before, thankfully the receipt was in the bag.  At least one thing went right. So now the wait begins. Two weeks until the new one should arrive or I’ll get  a call to say they’re not happy.

Fingers crossed,  all I want is a passport, like the one  I already had but with a different name on it. What have I done…. should I have stayed with the old one??? What about the UK passport – that one was a nightmare the first time round. I must have done something really wicked to be punished this way. Perhaps I’ll have a better day when I do that one. Pleasse ?!

Passport; courtesy of australia.edu  “Who are you”????  by The  Who..

Do you know who you are? Have you had the same kind of experience or feelings after getting married and changing your name? I can’t be the only one to have come upagaisnt this issue – can I?

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