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Posts Tagged ‘#The Blog That Wasn’t’

#TheBlogThatWasn't

image from www-liveinternet-ru       “Live Internet”

“In all the frustration and confusion of life, just take a moment and smile; everything will work out for the best”- Unknown author
~

Three hours ago I started a blog. It doesn’t take that long to get it written, proofed and scheduled for publishing. So what happened tonight to cause this huge delay? Why, none other than the new computer. It’s probably just as well that it is impossible to strangle a computer, although I’m sure it could be a reasonably good flying object. ……

”Excuse me Ma’am, but did you just witness an unidentified flying object travelling past your living room window?”

Reply: “Umm, err, well, no not really. There was a flicker at the corner of my eye, but I really couldn’t tell you what it was.”

No, of course not. Who would want to admit that it was a low flying computer flung with great venom for failing to supply – a connection to the internet!

I have been known to be guilty of impatience. I have been known to occasionally have a little flash of temper if things go awry too often. I can sulk like the best if the occasion warrants it, but there is something about a computer that refuses to connect to the internet which can make my blood boil. After all, that’s what the wretched thing has been designed to do. It is no longer a glorified typewriter, although I have to admit I wouldn’t mind a simple typewriter occasionally.  But this is a “state of the art” new computer, with all the added gadgets and gee gaws some computer nerdy person has been able to think up. It is its prime purpose, to connect the unwary to the internet, to be embroiled in heated debate over the merits of light or dark chocolate.

It has even been known to waste time by ensnaring the unwary into political rambunctious behaviour which frequently ends in persons being ejected from certain ‘prestigious’ groups. It hasn’t yet been accused of causing a gun fight at dawn or pistols at six paces and I’m sure that given time we’ll see the computer equivalent. If I look, and I’m sure not very hard, I’ll find games somewhere that will allow me to do just that.

However, if I can’t connect to the internet and do what must be done or what I want to do, then the very least it can offer me is the chance to say, “Beam me up Scotty”. Then I can away to a distant galaxy where no-one needs to do the washing or the ironing and no-one ever seems to get dirty or have showers, although now that I think about it, I’m sure I saw someone on Star Trek with a strategically draped towel at one stage. I’m not certain which “star date” they’re in at present.

Perhaps even better would be a hypnotic whirling light which transports me through a magical time warp to the Scottish highlands in the seventeenth century for a romp through the heather. Although that may not be such a good idea. I have a notion I may have read that women were supposed to be quiet back in those days and that would be a cruel and unusual punishment.

Aha! I knew this would happen. After finally giving up the idea of being able to get my planned blog done and amusing myself with some light hearted rambling, my computer has decided to play with me after all. Connection achieved. A satisfied smile lingers briefly around my mouth but it’s far too late. I’m tired and I need my sleep if I want to regain my health and sanity. Well, one out of three isn’t such a bad deal, is it?

#TheBlogThatWasn't

image from footage.shutterstock.com

I’ll keep my health and sanity for tonight, and the computer can retain its connection to itself until tomorrow, when I will give it a strong talking to in the vain hope that it has gained some ‘artificial intelligence’ overnight, and we can achieve a suitable working relationship. Harmony reigns supreme for the time being.

Good night all, or Good day. Perhaps a simple, enjoy yourself now, whatever takes your fancy. The serious Susan will return tomorrow for her scheduled blogging.

“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”
Epicurus

Blessings, Susan ♥

© Susan Jamieson 2014

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